Kristi
Lead Vocals & Frontwoman
Kristi does not just sing songs; she sells them. With a voice that handles classic-rock grit and 2000s pop attitude, she is the conduit between band and crowd — and yes, the Porch is literally hers.
The band
It started in a garage.
Five friends, a few favorite songs, and a name that set the bar exactly where it belonged.
Hagerstown → The Porch
No Expectations came together in late 2025 in a Hagerstown garage. Classic rock, ’90s alternative, ’00s favorites: the kind of songs that turn a room full of people into a room full of backing singers.
The Porch in Rohrersville is home turf. The spirit is the same wherever we play: good songs, good friends, and one more chorus before the night is over.
The lineup
Meet the usual suspects.
Stephen
Lead Guitar
Stephen brings both texture and temperature. From melodic solos to gritty blues riffs, he adds the wow factor that turns songs into performances.
Mike Jensen
Guitar
Mike locks in groove and layered tone that gives No Expectations its full, radio-ready wall of sound. The Jensen Medley — nine minutes of Led Zeppelin stitched into one monster — is named after him for a reason.
Curtis Holmes
Bass
Curtis lays down low-end law, connecting melody to rhythm and driving movement in every room.
John Saum
Drums & Vocals
John is the relentless engine behind the kit — right up until the AC/DC block, when he grabs a mic and drives the whole thing from the throne.